Dear God
Dear God, I can't sleep. I'm laying in bed with my eyes wide open. My mind wandering from one sad thought to the next. I'm sad, and confused, and frustrated, and lonely, and heartbroken. I pulled the box out today. The box in my mind where I gently place all the things I don't understand; the great mysteries, the sad moments I just can't explain, the "why do bad things happen to good people" questions, the earthquake, the rapes, the wars, the mommas who cannot take care of their children, Matthew 6:30 and how it applies to Haiti, and finally my thoughts and questions about the people I love who died of cancer after we prayed and prayed for healing. It's a box I like to keep closed, shoved in the dark corner while I pretend it doesn't exist. I hate pulling that box out, I hate shoving more emotion into it, but I'm glad I've been able to build this box. All those thoughts used to dominate my entire being. Every other thought was tainted...