Writing Prompt: Live like you mean it

Am I living like I mean it?

I sometimes imagine what people would say at my funeral, how many people would come and who. Would they say I lived a life of intention? That I lived a life that meant something and impacted people? Anytime I hear someone say, "so-and-so makes you feel like the most important person in the world when you're around them" I immediately think, "I want to do that!" I want people to feel like they have my undivided attention and that they are the most important person to me. I want to give people my undivided attention. I want my attention to be undivided.

There probably isn't one person who feels like this is my presence. I feel like there isn't a moment in my life where my attention isn't half on what I'm doing and half on what I need to be doing next. I feel like there is never a moment in my life these days where I can truly just be present in the moment. I'm in a constant state of rushing from one task to the next. From the full time job to the part time job. From swimming lessons to bed time. From dropping the kids off to picking kids up somewhere else. Running to church, rushing home for nap time, throwing food in the oven in between. Phones dinging and ringing, two kids constantly chattering, three teenagers never uttering a word it seems, husband wondering if I even remember he exists. My mind is constantly spinning: what's for supper, do we need to get groceries, is everyone passing their classes, am I a good mom, do I need to intervene, I haven't called so and so in weeks, did I answer that email, when is my next meeting, who needs to be at soccer and where does that kid even play again?!?

I want to stop, just for a moment, pour myself a cup of cinnamon rooibos tea and have a meaningful conversation, shed a few tears or sorrow a few of joy, laugh a little and just breathe. 

Just breathe and make the person sitting across from me feel like the most important person in the world in that moment.